People keep asking, when's the EP coming out. It's coming, it's coming!!! I honestly thought the process would be easier - write some great songs, record them, make a CD, duh. To be honest, the Honeygirl first EP project has been the slowest and most laborious process of my life!
Normally, I move quick. I am just born moving fast. Create, strategize, act, complete. That's normally how I roll. But this, this...this 4-5 song EP has literally taken a lifetime.
Growing up, my childhood was normal. My family was big, we lived on the outskirts of town on a six-acre farm in the middle of nowhere and no where near my friends. More than that, I think I was abnormally sensitive, cautious and maybe call me a conservative kid. My family is fairly conservative, sensitive and cautious overall, in my opinion as well. I feel today as an adult like I'm a decade behind everyone else in learning and experiences and I'm hurriedly catching up. I moved from a cautious house and life as a fairly quiet and shy person, to getting married. And continuing on as a closeted loudmouth, until I started singing.
I started taking singing lessons when I was twenty-something. I just had to. I just had to sing. I was naturally a pretty good singer and sang karaoke a lot and impressed my friends from time-to-time. Let me tell you, when I first started, I asked my coach how long the learning process would take. He never put a timeline on it for a reason. I really wanted to be the best singer I could be and secretly hoped that I was the next Celine Dion and just needed a few lessons to refine my tone. I really wanted to sing in a band and I have a strong need to feel the music, not just hear it.
It took years to find the right group. Granted, my unnecessary anxieties and perfectionism issues sometimes slow me down or keep great ideas idle. But mostly, I was struggling to sing others' music. And I LOVE other peoples' songs. But I really, really wanted to inspire and to connect with people. There was some material inside, dormant, but I emotionally, I couldn't reach it.
Then I got divorced. From that desperate process of healing and going through so much trauma and heartbreak and loss of everything and fear, there was space, emotion (soo much emotion), time, ideas, new experiences, bravery. There was no other choice but to be brave in every aspect as my life had started anew. I started journaling a lot, writing songs. I met some new people, and one in particular, Scotty, who encouraged me to write my own songs. And so I did. (partly in competition as he's an actual rockstar and songwriter and I needed to up my game quick!) And it's exhilarating when inspiration hits and an entire song will be in my head and I can jot it down in like 120 seconds (though it doesn't always work like that). And it is soo empowering. So gratifying. To hear, to sing something that is real and or that's the life of the party. That I created. That people have danced and even cried to. I'll never forget the first time we sang, "Booze, Bottles and Bullshit" and the entire bar yelled, "Bullshit!" along with me. I almost cried, it was validating for me as an artist - all because people were screaming bullshit!
There's a quote out there, "Musicians are just therapists you can party with." I love it. I hope it describes Honeygirl. I hope when you come to a show or hear our music and our favorite cover songs, you can relate, have fun, forget your troubles, get emotional, remember when, or just let loose and dance. And you'll never get a fake hug from me. Promise. I hate fake hugs.